Tuesday, April 08, 2008

On the heels of Easter, a sacrilegious post

Before you read this, bear in mind that only Eric has even an inkling of my feelings about God, Jesus, religion, life, death, and all that other good stuff. So, have a laugh, take offense, whatever. But don't judge – because you don't have a clue.

The kids and I went to Hobby Lobby yesterday to get some yarn for my mom. She is making a baby blanket for my newest unborn, born-again, Jewish great-nephew. (I'll explain that another time. Remind me.) Hobby Lobby is a Christian store. They are closed on Sundays to give families the opportunity to worship. They carry some items with religious symbols on them. I guess that's fine. Although I don't think Christmas and Easter are really about colorful wooden crosses, if people need to remind themselves of their devotion through home decor made in China or feel they need to remind others, it's sort of a free country.

So, it's getting warmer outside, and one of the end caps in the store had summery stuff. Next to wooden American flags and stars on sticks, there were beach balls. White beach balls with crosses and fish. No loaves, though. Anyway, I thought these holy balls were about the funniest things I'd ever seen. So I bought a couple. Because you need more than one, otherwise you don't have balls. Just a ball. And I like to have a ball, but these were holy balls. So two really were required.

Sick #1: These religious symbols are right next to the patriotic ones. Puke.
Sick #2: These religious symbols are on a beach ball. What the hell?
Sick #3: Oh, the joy of playing with Jesus balls?
Sick #4: Oh, the joy of kicking Jesus balls?
Sick #5: Oh, the joy of kicking the shit out of religious imperialism?

Somehow, my $1.98 seems well spent.


jan said...

I agree with you Amy, I hate to see religious symbols on everyday things. I remember a minister's wife , telling me that for Christmas they received the tackiest gifts. The one I remember was the nativity as a condiment set. Mary was salt, Joseph Pepper, The manager was for butter. I think you get the idea. Her comment was, that they were ordinary people, liked a drink now and then, some fancy food, but everyone felt they might be offended if it didn't have a religious theme.

aims said...

Oh how you have made me laugh this morning!!

Thank you!

I think I might have to go out and get me a pair of religious balls too and see what I can do with them.....

Amy said...

Jan, my mom's best friend is the wife of a minister. She is, shall we say, earthy. I love her.

Aims, glad to give a little cheer.